Saturday, April 3, 2010

Confessions of a Crazy Cat Lady...

I was inspired by Stephanie Howell's blog post right here, to do a little confessing of my own just as Stephanie did on her blog.  Perhaps she will start a new trend of people being real and honest on their blogs... this could be fun... horrifying... or both.

1.  I'll start off with the most obvious one that I have mentioned before... my partner (John) is a man who is 14 years my junior. I take a never ending amount of teasing about this fact from my friends. However, please note that if this fact makes me a "Cougar" than all I have to say about that is... this may explain my borderline crazy connection to felines. Here's John.

2.  I have seven cats.  Yes, seven.  AND I am middle-aged (49 years old).  I guess that makes me a crazy cat lady... see number 1., above.  I also talk to my cats and believe that one of them (who was a stray that forced me to take her in) "told" me her name is "Mary".  My daughter's find this odd and it continues to be a topic of conversation between them despite the fact that it was over 7 years ago that I shared that information with them!

3.  One of my very best girlfriends is not a girl at all, but rather my ex-husband Jerry (see picture of us below) I know people find our relationship strange but there are advantages, like being able to celebrate the holidays with our children all together.  John and I have introduced him to all of our freinds who he now socializes with along with us and we helped fix him up with his current girlfriend. John and Jerry have also developed a friendship and hang out together doing guy stuff as well.

3.  I own four unruly and misbehaved canines, who are this way through no fault of their own, it is simply bad training on our part. I spent a lot of money on obediance training and then more money on advanced obediance training.  I learned........ I am not a good dog trainer even if I pay a lot of money to try to be, they learned to sit... but mostly only if bribed with a treat.

4.  The greatest lie I have ever told, "No, that is NOT my dog. :-)

5.  Many, many times every day my dogs race through the house back and forth between the front windows and bark at people who walk by.  They have been barking at the same neighbor for the last FOUR YEARS who walks his dog by my house EVERY DAY at 12 noon.  My grandsons have witnessed this so much, that they too now, run through the house barking at him right along with my dogs.  (I can't help wonder what the good neighbor thinks about THAT!)   This is the little culprit that always sounds the alarm for the other three dogs!  Don't let that sweet face fool you! :-)

5.  I have two big, fat, spoiled Boer Goats, who are often dirty (they love to roll in sand) and I have been known to accept kisses from them on the lips.  I also feed them animal crackers and wonder if that makes them cannibals. (just joking).

6.  Sometimes my friends and family poke fun at me by calling me "Elizabitch". (can I say that outloud here?)  I laugh along with them... but only because I know it is sometimes just a little bit truthful! :-|  (sidenote: these same family and friends love me very much and I am one lucky woman to have them all!)

7.  I hate peas, peanut butter, bananas and every kind of bean (except green beans)... I think there may be something wrong with me because of that. I gag when I make my grandsons peanut butter sandwiches and I always ask if there are beans in the chili, despite the crazy looks I get for asking.

8.  I have an unhealthy, unreasonable and apparently unpreventable fear of choking.  Not my own, but someone else's choking in front of me, especially children.  (I find it very difficult to watch my grandsons eat without feeling tense and I cut anyone's food up into tiny bite size pieces if I am given the opportunity).  I think whoever it was that invented hard round candies should be shot at dawn tomorrow and that the candy companies that STILL make them should be stopped immediately by any means necessary.

9.  My pet peeves include: window blinds that are pulled up but left uneven (I HATE THAT!)... people that do not push their chairs in after sitting in them, lights left on, drawers left open, cupboards not shut, pen clickers,  tail-gaters and road-ragers... it's so DANGEROUS! I hate weak handshakes and when men and/or boys don't hold doors open for women or give up their chairs for them (especially elderly women!).  And my number one pet peeve.... people who are purposely MEAN or CRUEL to other human beings or animals!

10.  I read the Twilight books and watched the movies with my daughters and I am in love with Edward despite the fact that he is so much younger than me ... it must be the Cougar in me.

11.  I am my mother's only child.  We are very close...but there are times when I think that NO ONE should ever be allowed to have just ONE child that is left to deal with their parent(s).  :-)  I admit there are times when I would love to have a sibling to call up on the phone and say... "Okay, your turn."

12.  I am my mother's only child.  We are very close, but I suspect that my mother sometimes wishes she had more than one child so she could call up one of my siblings and say, "Okay, your turn."

This is one of my favorite photos of the two of us from about 13 years ago!  My how time flies!

13.  When no one is home, I sometimes talk out loud to myself.  When my family is home, I do that too...only I pretend I am talking to one of the cats or dogs.

14.  I am deathly afraid of spiders inside my house...but have been known to pretend I am not in an effort to get my children (when they were little) and now my grandsons to kill them for me.  I am ashamed of this fact, but do it anyhow.  Last year we discovered that my youngest daughter is allergic to spider bites so this has only heightened my fear of them in the house! As if I NEEDED to be more afraid! :-)

15. I am addicted to American Idol, Grey's Anatomy, Private Practice, House, Bones and Gary Unmarried.  I record every episode on the DVR and watch them after they are recorded so I can skip the commercials (it makes me feel like I am not spending so much time watching television!).

16.  I love a clean house but I HATE TO CLEAN (it just gets dirty again.) I do love working in the yard however and don't mind if that just gets dirty again! :-)  Here's my clean yard! :-) Please disregard the fact that I do not provide a photograph of my clean home!

17.  I love my family with all my heart and feel lucky that so many people live here and visit here... but when I know everyone is going to be gone... I SAVOR those moments and spend them with the blinds shut and the phone left unanswered so I can be by myself. I sometimes even park my Explorer in the garage so it looks like I am not home. 

18.  I am a very messy crafter and sometimes I throw all my scraps of paper away just to clean up faster (rather than file the paper scraps away in the folders that I have for just that purpose).

19.  I CANNOT leave the house without my toenails polished, but I very rarely paint my fingernails. 

20.  Sometimes when I haven't had any time alone in quite a while, I pretend I am sick when we are all suppose to go somewhere just so I can be home alone.  There I said it!!!  (For the record, my daughter's caught on QUITE awhile ago... but shhhhhh, John hasn't figured it out yet!).

21.  and finally, I confess that I haven't confessed nearly everything there is to confess....

what confessions do you have?

3 Scrappy Comments:

Kristina H said...

Oh my gosh are too funny! I would love to play along with you...but it's gonna take a while for me to come up with confessions...I'm mean..what do perfect people really have to confess? (okay...that was a joke...I just need time to narrow them down)
Hope all is well in your world!

Elizabeth (Beth) Moore said... seriously crack me up... I adore you!!!

LUV2SCRAP said...

I just found your blog and fell in love with this post your too funny ok hilarious...LOVE you attitude in life but can't uderstand why "Peanut Butter" I love Peanut Butter....LOL I would love to join in the fun but as Kristina H. says too much to post and some of it I think I could get in serious trouble for especailly my Confession on being Obsessed with Scapbooking and my DH doesn't know how I ended up with so much, according to him..which by some of these blogs I have nothing compared to some of these due time ;) Oh yeah and I have 4 dogs and 1 Parrot who says a bad word and can't figure out where he learned that...and I'm being serious...LOL Thanks for the laughs.

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